How To Help?

Hello,

One person that I know, but do not know so very well asked me for a small amount of money. I gave it to her with the understanding that she did not have to pay it back. Probably five months later she asked for a larger amount of money which I simply gave her, but with the understanding that she would pay me back. Perhaps it was three months later when she told me about a monetary jam she was in. This time she was asking for a lot more money. I did discuss it with Leroy, but gave her the money even though he was quite hesitant and felt she probably would not pay it back. He has had a bit more practice in this territory. We talked about how we could manage without this money if we never saw it again, but I was confident that she would repay. Well, so far Leroy has been right and I have been wrong because two months have gone by. Friday she again asked for more money. This time I regretfully said no. How does one know where the point is that one should help or not?

There is a part of me that believes she still will pay it back, but a part also wonders about that. What is the right thing to do?

This afternoon while delivering neighborhood newsletters, I came to a house where a young woman had opened the door to yell in at someone in the house. I held up the newsletter to hand to her when she told me, “I don’t live here.” In a second she turned back to yell in the house. As I turned to leave, a young man came out and started yelling too. I saw him grab her around the neck. I turned back and yelled/talked over them, “Do you need help?”

At that point an older woman came out of the house and all three of them paused to look at me. The young man released the woman and I moved on. Later, I came back down this street and the two younger people were still arguing, but at a much lower volume level. Again I am struck by the fact that I do not know how to help or what is the best way to respond, praying seems like little help, but I did that too. I did not get too close as I know that domestic violence is dangerous even for police, whom I would have called if anyone had indicated that it would be a good idea to get help. Life is not simple.

Paula