Introversion

Hello,

 This morning there was a breakfast for the women of the church. I could think of one hundred reasons why I did not want go even though I had put it on the calendar as a reminder. When I had seriously settled into the idea of not going it was mentioned at a study we were at on Thursday evening. At that meeting someone offered us tickets to a concert as she was not sure she could make it. We said yes to the concert. Yesterday she called and told me that the concert tickets were ours and she could give them to me at the breakfast. So I decided to go, but then spent much of the rest of the day fussing in my mind. Questions were: what would I wear, Would I find anyone to talk to, what shoes should I wear to walk in and then to be at the breakfast, who would I know there, what to take as a dish for the potluck, would anyone want to talk to me, and what to put the food in. The person who was giving me the tickets told me she would save a seat for me if she arrived first, so I did not have to worry about who to sit with.

I dressed more casually than not, put the fruit mixture in a ordinary looking bowl that had a good sealable cover so it would not spill in my backpack, and packed a change of shoes. When I got there I found people in variety of dress from casual to dressed up. Bowls were also quite varied and there was a great amount of food for all food groups. I even found that I knew quite a few of the people there even though most of them were familiar faces whose names were buried somewhere in the back of my brain.

It is so hard for me to go to groups where I do not really know people well, but usually it is just fine. So why do I consistently bother fussing ahead of time. It seems I am a slow learner.

Paula